May 19, 2006

CLAYTON, NC — The Carl Spackler Open Championship returns this year with just more than a classic field of players. The tournament returns with safe bus transportation to/from the golf course and hotel. It returns to counter the large volume of alcohol.

The Clarion Hotel Tower resides in downtown Raleigh one block from the police station. The golf course resides in an upscale housing development in southeastern Raleigh. The drive time by car is 30 minutes minimum.

"We are expecting a minimum of 3 hour commutes to the golf course during the tournament," said Vice President of Player Transportation. "Add the practice round and you have at least 4 hours of driving, riding, gas and good old vehicle maintenance to consider. The private bus eliminates the hassles for $5 each way."

The bus seats 38 golfers while 48 golfers are signed up and paid for the bus. The drunkest 10 golfers are expected to dance around the polls and provide complimentary, but unwanted entertainment.

"Zabonik will probably be one of those drunks," said Jason Watson. "Hopefully his stench of 90 degree heat inconjunction with a passing shower, beer and possibly barf will be neutralized by Hevy Joes Gold Bond."

The bus schedule is located in the online itinerary and will depart ontime regardless if golfers are onboard, sleeping, finishing breakfast, in the bathroom, lost or too drunk to walk.

"This show has a schedule," said tournament organizer Jeremy Myers. "Riders who will be late better be ready to hitchhike."

The 2006 Carl Spackler Open Championship begins in 19 days.