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Buttered Pork

July 18, 2005

POTTSVILLE, PA — What did the final round of the 2005 Carl Spackler Open look like?  A race with pileups at every turn and dents (in trees) to make an insurance adjuster go nuts. But in the end, one golfer and one man navigated around the wreckage and through to the checkered flag. That was Rick Dosky taking home the Golden Jacket and Pork who most did not expect to cross the finish line.

Pork, the side kick of Mountain Valley director of golf, Walt Tobash, was there every turn, during every big moment, driving the beverage cart, providing the Gold Bond on Friday, serving the first tee, and providing many other great moments.

Brian Flanagan caught up with Pork in the proshop after the tournament for a few words.  "The tournament was great," said Pork with a smile.  "This week was not work, but a vacation for everyone involved.  I was indeed entertained especially on Friday."

Pork was Friday's most valuable person after rounding up a pair of shorts from the clubhouse pro shop and some Gold Bond for a poopy butt.  "There is no doubt someone owes Pork a favor," says SNN co-anchor Brian "Butter" Flanagan.  "I'm quite sure about that."

Pork was asked about the carnage around the golf course.  "There is clearly many missing branches and lots of dents in our trees," says Pork.  "You definitely got your money's worth.  I will be busy next week patching things up."

Walt Tobash and Pork have been verbally invited to the 2006 Carl Spackler Open scheduled to be played June 7-10, 2006 at an undisclosed location.  The next Open Championship could very well see 90-110 participants in a short 6-year history.