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Tanning: Key to Sash

March 19, 2010

LAGUNA VISTA, TX — "My uncle says you've got a screw loose," Lacey Underall said to Ty Webb. Along with Ty, Trent Cooper thinks her uncle molests collies and "salmon" golf shirts are high profile.

Trent Cooper won the inaugural Ms. Lacey Underall sash, ear rings, and crown at the 2008 Carl Spackler Open by a landslide. He returned to the 2009 Carl Spackler Open with his pink logo hat and ready to start building his team of "pretty boys".

Captains Club member Jason Watson eventually won the Award due to his daily color matching underwear. He wore the sash and crown in Virginia and received a pink logo baseball cap.

"He truely earned it," says senior member Bob Morris. "He has been dressing too pretty for too long. His underwear and 'Paula Creamer shoes' are now part of the tournament. Cooper has done well in his first year."

Cooper has chosen Las Vegas over South Padre Island this year. This leaves the responsiblity to Jason Watson of Dallas, TX to crown the next Miss Lacey Underall.

"I am not giving anything out just to give it out," says Watson of the Lacey Underall Sash. "I am looking for a true pretty boy to join our gang."

There are a number of unconfirmed reports out of the business office of tanning. "The tanners are absolute front runners," said Watson. "I am sure there are lots of guys who just started their one-month tanning memberships. These are the keys to taking home the sash and being a part of our gang.

Mr. Cooper and I will always reserve the right to defer new memberships if nobody is worthy."

Watson was asked whether he was tanning. Watson replied, "What do you think? There is a commitment surrounding Mr. Cooper's organization. I have lost 20 pounds this winter and might export another 5 pounds into thin air before mid-April."

The Captains Club will award the Lacey Underall Sash and crown at the Awards Presentation, which is scheduled for April 18 at Bayside Cafe in Laguna Vista, TX.