News Release
Storybook Pass
Like a Sinking Ship
License to Kill Gophers
Wipe that Horses Ass
Bad Start costs Bateson
Slick Wins Closest to Pin
As White as a Tiger
What if?
Scrambled Greatness
Bitch Ain't Doggin Me!
Munksgard Wears Outfits
Accept the Challenge
Transportation Vehicle Arrives
Cederquist Signs; 3 Days Left
Horses Ass Returns
2003 Awards
Player Meeting Scheduled
New Kitchen Pass Award
Sokos Signs Really Late
Remembering Perfection
Wipe that Horses Ass

July 1, 2003

ASHTABULA, OH — With a Watkeys head first slide through the windsheld of a golf cart to live up to, John Dick tried his best at the 3rd annual Carl Spackler Open Championship to do one better.  If only he could have held it for five more holes.

John Dick, walking around in what appeared to be a panic walk to gain relief, proceeded to take his son's new and favorite golf towel up into the woods to do his business.  He returned with a smile of relief.

"Dad, where is my golf towel", said Gumby.  "It is up in the woods", replied John.  A somewhat confused Gumby returned, "What do you mean?"  John answered, "I figured you would not want it anymore."  Hole #13 will never be the same and Thunder Hill's Amen Corner has a new name.

John Dick won the Horses Ass Award over Jeff Cowan who did a complete belly smacker off the bridge of the island green into the pond surrounding.  Although the dive was a 10, John Dick stole the show with his problem.