March 15, 2006

DURHAM, NC — David Neill announced in late-December that he will be the 59th player and 7th player to represent North Carolina in the 2006 Carl Spackler Open Championship, slated for June 8 in Clayton, NC. Naturally, a few Captains Club members accompanied Neill to the press conference.

Neill has a sketchy and unknown past as he signs during the eleventh-hour. "Dave is expected to be multi-talented player and we don't mean driving, chipping and putting," says Kevin Long, Jr.. "His talents better lie in drinking, tolerance to Pokey's seminars and endurance from lack of sleep. I fully expect him to be leader and not a follower."

Brandon Hunter followed by reading a statment prepared by himself. "Mentally, Neill's the weakest golfer I've seen in the Raleigh-Durham area. His smile says, "If you suck at golf as badly as I do, you just hide behind ironed Ashworth apparel and intimidate with legal jargon."

Neill joins Lashley and Jon Marti as the 3rd member of the Spackler Legal Team. Dave has submitted one "Punia-like" scorecard to date and is sure to receive at least 1 point for triple bogey. The 2006 Carl Spackler Open begins in 84 days.