December 29, 2006

POWELL, OH — Marty Zabonik, 2-time member of the Carl Spackler Open Championship, filed his required paperwork early for the 2007 tournament. The returning member has an awful record at the tournament that continues to try to make him a hero. "My crappy play will be transformed into golden play very soon," said Zabonik in a simple written statement. "Looking forward to proving my play in Michigan."

Most guys would relish rounds of 83, 85, 82, 89, 84. Most guys would win a Golden Jacket with tournament rounds in the 80's. However, most guys do not register for a major championship with a 2 handicap.

The Z attended his first Open in 2005 at Mountain Valley. He placed 2nd in overall stroke, but terribly when it counted. Zabonik posted 27 rounds in 2005 Virtual Tournament. All 27 rounds required less strokes than any of his three rounds at Mountain Valley.

"He sucks when it counts," says buddy Bill Bateson. "I was not a poster child at Mountain Valley either, but Marty should be leading by example. We have lots of hackers seeing this type of negative play; quite frankly... it is unacceptable."

Zabonik returned last June to make things right. Instead, he opened the tournament with an unthinkable 17-over 89. The round was his worst since September 2002 when he shot 90. "My chances for a Golden Jacket were dashes quickly at the Neuse," said Zabonik of his 2nd major championship. "Although the two 7-point birdies kept me statistically in it, the round was probably the worst round of my life."

The 17-over 89 was not the worst on record, but most likely felt like his worst. It was the highest round in 115 attempts, which defines a career for most golfers. He shot another disappointing 12-over 84 during moving day. The sole 9-point birdie was more than half the 16 points he scored in day 2. "My final round 75 is the only thing in past 2 years supporting my handicap. I fully expect the critics after the past two years."

The 3-over 75 was the 2nd best round of the 63-player tournament scoring him 57 points. The monster round vaulted him 27 spots up the leaderboard into 26th position.

Bateson remarked, "I'm sure a lot of guys were wondering if he is a paper champion. It really shows how bad Jay Glover played with Mr. Debacle escaping the Al Czverik Outfit."

The Z has signed once again with assurance things will improve. "How can things get any worse?" said Zabonik to questions about his tournament meltdowns. "I am the current holder of the Closest to the Pin Award, which has been nice." He took the award away from 2-time winner Tom McCauley as one bright spot along with getting drunk 4-days in a row.

The 2007 Carl Spackler Open Championship begins in 159 days. The postmarked registration deadline was yesterday.