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Rookie Tsunami

February 13, 2008

PERU, IN — A 'rookie tsunami' is a series of registrations from several rookies, who rapidly insert themselves into a tournament field quickly and surprisingly. Rookies Kelly Smith, Jack Schone, Bob Jastrzebski, Jr, and Andy Hanks came ashore this week and boosted the tournament attendance to 64 golfers.

The 2008 Carl Spackler Open Championship signing period ended back on December 28, 2007. The tournament field had reached 57 golfers and remained that way for more than a month.

"It was pretty clear what had happened," said Greg Long, Chairman of the Captains Club. "It was a classic tsunami. Just before an attendance tsunami reaches the business office, the attendance count will recede dramatically, exposing areas that are normally always submerged by 64 or 68 golfers. The 57 golfer count was our warning something was big was headed our way. The only thing Dosky could do was keep his mailbox empty."

Kelly, Jack, Bob, and Andy sign as the 2nd, 3rd, 4th, and 5th rookies. They also sign as the 33rd, 34th, 35th, and 36th players to the 8th Major Championship. Bob Jastrzebski, Jr. ensures Michigan is represented in the national golf tournament.

Vice President of Cuisine, Mike Trojanowski, was asked for his take on the tsunami. He asked, "What happened when they came ashore? What kind of destruction did they do?" Long replied, "I am told that Bob will add plenty of destruction to the turf with deep hacking-style divots. Kelly (picture shown) is a referral from Jon Munksgard. That has destruction written all over it. Jack has a 1.6 stroke handicap, which is a wave of destruction to everyone except Zabonik and Ridgeway."

The first wave of signings were used to establish a tournament field divisible by four. The second wave of registrations were accepted together in a group of four to keep the tournament attendance divisible by four.

Trojanowski asked, "A classic tsunami has more than two waves. Do you expect another wave?" Long replied, "Not sure. We need to let these registrations recede. When the dust settles, there should be a couple of guys on the waiting list. We could host a tournament field of 68 golfers with a couple more unknown registrations. This would consume all 34 double bed rooms at the Best Western Circus City in Peru, IN. We could also use the waiting list to balance out the cancellations in late-April."

Andy Hanks signs as a rookie. He is referred by legendary Mike Davis, a.k.a. Gumby, of Warren, PA. Gumby filed a written statement for Andy. "This will without doubt be the highlight of Andy's illustrious golf career," said Gumby from his home in Warren, PA. "A golden jacket in his closet would be something to relish for decades. I hope he takes this seriously and seeks rookie advice from locals Joe Muscaro and John Sabat."

Jack Schone will be attending with ties to Chad Long's neighborhood. Kelly Smith is referred by Jon Munksgard and Mike Davis. Bob Jastrzebski, Jr. is the offspring of Bob Jastrzebski also of Michigan. There are 112 days before the golf tournament.