News Release
Beta Version 2
PostStats LLC
System Overhaul
Tee Time Broadens
Scoring Integrity Added
Golf.PostStats.com Debut
Aloha!

April 18, 2008

KANEOHE, HI — Erik Shirreffs, a.k.a. Devil Dog, of Hawaii has signed a national letter-of-intent to play golf at the 2008 Carl Spackler Open Championship, Pat Boland of the Captains Club announced today. The rookie and Marine Corps parachutist will join the field for the annual 54-hole tournament as the 63rd player.

Erik's golf skills are still invalid, but he is expected to have a legendary Mike Lewis-type scorecard that gives him 1 point for triple bogey. He also enters the tournament with a very strong forearm and military sounding voice.

"Get down and give me 20," yelled Shirreffs after his final round with Matt Davis in Michigan. "I AM YOUR WORST NIGHTMARE!" Erik's head was reportedly down and screaming into his Matt's left ear after each push up.

Devil Dog is expected to perform a clinic on Thursday. After golf, the self-taught guitarist will dazzle the field with his lovely singing voice and rendition of Celine Dion's "My Heart Will Go On". The clinic at Homer's Sports Bar is expected to even bring tears to eyes of member Mean Jean Dore of Virginia Beach.

"Shirreffs is not your average player," says member Pat Boland. "If he can keep the ball in play off the tee while drinking Mimosa, he can position himself for bogey on most holes. That can be gut wrenching for the rest of the field with fairways like Rock Hollow."

Boland commented further, "Devil Dog was one of the first Humvee's into Iraq. This is the kinda military-style leader we need to keep everyone in line. I am so excited to have someone around who can snap Pokey in two, which is something we have needed for years. I heard the movement of his eyes can have guys behaving. We are talking a lethally trained martial arts expert and Marine, which really makes Gumby look like a pussy."

Shirreffs struggled in Michigan with 59th position. Sources close to Devil Dog indicated that jet lag was most likely the culprit. He placed 59th position with just Jason Watson, Tom Fowble, and Mark Wray placing lower. "He needs to shake off the jet lag quickly this year," says buddy Matt Boland. "Nobody wants this guy in a bad mood."

Erik will represent Hawaii for the second straight year. Hawaii will be represented along with California, Arizona, Texas, Missouri, Illinois, Indiana, North Carolina, Virginia, West Virginia, Pennsylvania, New York, Ohio, and Michigan.

The 2008 Carl Spackler Open begins play in 47 days. The mandatory player meeting begins at 8:45AM on Thursday, June 5 inside the Rock Hollow clubhouse. The second addition of the daily Tournament Pairing Sheets will be distributed at this time.