August 7, 2008

VIRGINIA BEACH, VA — The 2008 Virtual Tournament has a new leader by the name of John Mello. A leader by 2.9 points per round after another strong round at Heron's Ridge Golf Club. The Virginia rookie posted his fourth 11-over 83 in the past 15 days scoring between 77 and 79 points per round.

Mello opened the season with 10 rounds worth an average of 64.1 points per round. He turned the corner in mid-June while stalking the leaders. He captured the lead over the weekend. The 11th oldest round of 48 points was replaced by the latest 79-point round.

"I am feeling good about my rookie season within the Spackler experience," says Mello. "I have played about 20 rounds in the last two months and watched my USGA Index go from 25.7 in April to 14.4 in August."

Mello averages 6.8 pars per round and 6.1 bogeys per round. He also cards 3.1 double-bogeys per round.

While this has done nothing for my marriage, it has done wonders for my golf game," said Mello. "I can tell everyone except the wife that the trade-off was well worth it! I am feeling confident this winter will result in a low handicap and into spring with a light wallet."

The pessimistic Jeff Miller commented on latest leader. "I sound like a broken record after talking about Hench earlier this weekend," said Miller. "Nobody bothered to mention the round killing snowman at the 9th hole. The Spackler News Network needs to keep the news real."

Mello was asked about the snowman and the blow up. "The house behind the 9th green and the gal who lives there reminds me prohibits focus. She reminds me of the porn actress who walked naked in the curtainless house just a couple of years ago. Miller judges my snowman negatively, but he just does not understand how misleading the scores are at the 9th hole."

John Mello grabs the top spot from Don Creighton, who dawned on the Carl Spackler Outfit back in June. Mello has also committed with the business office this summer as probable for the 2009 Carl Spackler Open Championship.