August 18, 2008

MOUNT VERNON, OH — Brian Long showed up on Saturday morning at Chapel Hill Golf Club with a sparkle in his eye. He pulled into the parking lot with the course starter, Greg Garrett, Tom Fowble, and Greg Long standing on the first tee.

He quickly put on his shoes and teed off before placing his golf cart on the cart. Everyone was surprised when he smacked his opening shot down the middle of the fairway. Would it be a career day?

Brian added lots of confidence through the first nine holes. He grabbed a sandwich and teed off the 10th hole with 1/3 sandwich in his mouth.

"I have seen Dosky tee with a cigarette in his mouth," said Captains Club member Greg Garrett. "This was a little different. It was the best and worst shot ever seen with a sandwich in mouth. His tee shot was actually down the middle of the fairway and pretty impressive."

Long finished his round while scoring four pars and eleven bogeys. None of his bogeys was any uglier than his last at the 18th hole.

Brian Long, a.k.a. Ruthie, drove his ball down the middle of the fairway with 178 yards to the pin. He used the golf cart GPS to decide on his next club. With a couple of waggles, he launched his ball right of the green.

The ball landed well right of the green (photo shown), bounced off the cart path and then bounced again, but this time off the chapel. The ball bounced back off the roof and towards the green.

"The shot was simply amazing," said Greg Garrett. "You need to be a hacker, but with distance to pull that off."

Long then played his birdie. Ruthie chipped his ball down the small hill onto the back of the green where the ball came to rest. Long then putted his ball 23-feet past the hole and off the front of the green for par.

"It was getting ridiculous," said Greg Long. "I was wondering if he was going to take a ten."

Ruthie then surprised everyone when he putted from fringe and dropped his 23-foot putt for a very ugly bogey. "It was hacking at its best," said senior member Tom Fowble. "He has redefined, 'all over the place'. He was right, left, over, in, and off a chapel in 3 strokes. It was the ugliest bogey ever seen or heard of."

Brian Long finished in a tie with Tom Fowble. They both carded 20-over 92. Fowble did score 70 points with Brian scoring just 61 points.

In related news, Greg Long is now a father for the 4th time. His fourth child (third son) was born on Sunday around noon. He fired a 10-over 82 on Saturday with a snowman at the 2nd hole. Long scored 60 points.