October 27, 2008

COLUMBUS, OH — It was the course conditions.  I was hung-over.  The wind was horrible.  I was using different clubs.  I just had my manhood taken away.  These are just some of the many excuses someone would have after a bad round of golf.  Nothing, however, could prepare the Spackler world for what we’re about to hear.  Jonny Mac just shook his head and replied “how’d those lessons work out now from Troy? “  and after starting on a rampage about how there is no possible way that slick could golf that bad mac stopped, and then yelled – “wait – isn’t Slick supposed golf with integrity?  I’m calling the rules committee – he’s padding his card for more points! “

All of a sudden Judge Smails comes bursting into the room, “McCAULEY, do you know what I just saw?  McCauley says, “No Sir.”  Elihu replies….”the worst score in Spackler history by supposed 10 handicapper.”  â€œHow is this guy going to go to Poplar Grove and shoot an 81 and then shoot this score at Indian Springs?”  McCauley replies, “I don’t know Sir, but I will put my best man on it.”  Elihu leaves in a fury of brown suede and tells Porterhouse to wax his shoes.        

To put the score in perspective (don’t worry, we’ll get to the score soon), let’s compare this to Jason Ridgeway.  If Jason shoots in the 80’s one may wonder if any of the above quote could apply, but if Jason shoots in the 90’s, well, I think that would open the doors for others to try and take him down and we could finally agree that marriage has finally gotten the best of him.  After hearing that – Jeff Miller proclaimed, “Jason’s shooting in the 90’s?  finally I have a chance to compete with him”.

"I needed to finish double-eagle, eagle, eagle, eagle to break 100," says Greg Long. "Little did I know that an 11 on the 15th hole was in my future."

Greg Garrett, his playing partner – if you call that playing – was awe struck to the train wreck he witnessed.  â€œHe sucked!  I saw him go from one bunker to another bunker and then back to the fairway all on one hole” Greg laughed while posting the scores.  â€œ4 kids are just too many for him to handle, they have completely screwed up his golf game”.

So we leave this story up for discussion…sandbagging?  A valid excuse?  You be the judge.  But I do know this – when Greg Long shoots 44 over par, that’s right…a 116, the water cooler discussion start swirling and the questions of his integrity or golf game start to come into play.  Meanwhile, Doskey, Flannagan, Daw and Mike Lewis all started to have some hope that maybe the time has come for them to actually knock the chip off Greg’s shoulder and beat him head to head.