May 26, 2009

AMHERST, VA — Are you sash worthy? Can you win and wear the Ms. Lacey Underall Sash in honor of Trent Cooper? Trent Cooper will determine this June who wears the sash after winning the inaugural year. He will determine who would look best with the sash.

The Ms. Lacey Underall sash was inspired by Trent Cooper and his "salmon" golf shirts. "We need an award for his gayness," said senior member Jean Dore outside the Super 8 Motel in Brooklyn, MI. "He deserves a crown and sash."

Jean Dore followed up with the Ms. Lacey Underall sash in Peru, IN. "Trent might be withholding the sash every year," says Dore. "The only other thing in the running right now are the 'Paula Creamer pink' shoes that Jason Watson wears on Friday.

"Why isn't the Ms. Lacey Underall Sash a 'Trent Cooper Sash'?" asked Joe Muscaro of Warren, PA. Dore replied, "Because Cooper is not that worthy."

The award will be worn on Saturday night similar to the Carl Spackler Outfit. It will be returned on Sunday morning to Mike Trojanowski with all outfits for the following year.

Trent Cooper and his sash winner will receive a pink logo cap for future easy identification.

"Cooper won the inaugural one by a landslide," says Jeremy Myers. "The Paula Creamer shoes are over the line, but Cooper is ridiculous. I am glad he has a wife and two kids."

The 2009 Carl Spackler Open Championship begins will be held at Poplar Grove in the small village of Amherst, VA. Tournament officials have 88 baseball tickets for the Hillcats/Keys game on Thursday night with the Don Creighton, in the Carl Spackler Outfit, throwing out the first pitch.