June 23, 2009

LYNCHBURG, VA — Patrick McElroy brought his hockey sticks in his golf bag to Amherst. He experienced both a Pittsburgh Penguins Stanley Cup and Carl Spackler Outfit two weeks ago. He was all smiles in Virginia after securing last place by 24 points with 71 points.

McElroy struggled with his hockey swing throughout the week. He completed his opening round with 4 points and a back nine 31-over 67.

The 50-over 122 strokes was his second worst round by total strokes over his lengthy 9-year career. The worst was last month at Scioto Reserve where he carded a 69-over 141. To put the terrible tournament in perspective, McElroy's fourth and fifth worst rounds ever were Round 2 and Round 3 in Amherst.

"He sucks worse than Chris Hays," says Captains Club member Jason Watson. Senior member Tom Fowble agreed and added, "He also sucks worse than Mark Wray." McElroy's golf game has clearly dropped off a cliff since he easily broke 100 strokes at the legendary tough Thunder Hill Golf Club.

"The rained out practice round allowed me to keep my stroke count lower," says McElroy with a smile. I nearly broke 100 on Wednesday." McElroy struggled on the back nine each and everyday. Pat never broke 60 strokes on the back nine.

McElroy, a.k.a. MacDaddy, came to Virginia after a 5-year layoff. He entered his 3rd tournament averaging 2.6 pars per round, 5.2 bogeys per round, and 5.9 double-bogeys per round. He went home on Sunday with 3 pars and 9 bogeys through 54 holes.

"I really enjoyed the tournament and looking forward to making adjustments," said McElroy. "I can assure you the Outfits were worn with class and a smile."

McElroy continued the tradition of the Carl Spackler Outfit. He followed hacker Don Creighton from 2008, birdie-free Mark Wray from 2007, par-free Jay Glover from 2006, drunken Mike Herron of 2005, bogey-free Mike Watkeys from 2004, double-bogey free Jon Munksgard from 2003, drunken Tom McCauley from 2002, and the disasterous Mike Trojanowski from 2001.