September 10, 2009

TERRA ALTA, WV — 4's and 7's.  Kings and Little Ones.  3-5-7.  Get used to these names gentlemen.  With Golfapalooza being a little more than 2 weeks away, dreams of poker greatness are entering most Loozer's heads.  For the uninitiated, the before mentioned names are 3 of the more popular games played at Alpine Lakes.  Pots have been seen as high as $200 and some friendships have been severely tested at the twin poker tables at the Wilson cabin.  

When sitting down to play with the veteran Loozers, here are few things to keep in mind.

1)  Don't drink Miller Lite plastic bottles around Lyme.  Chances are either that he will spit in your beer, or worse, you'll drink [gulp] his.

2)  Do not be fooled by Butter's plastic coated "poker hand rank".  The man can play, but sometimes the excitement of the porn clutters his mind.

3)  Kaniecki money is sometimes pooled.  Especially if the pot rises over the $100 mark.  (Eric is not allowed to bring more.....)

4)  If Quackenbush introduces a "new" game......he will "forget" to include an integral part of the instructions.......thereby causing you to lose considerable jack.

5)  Grab a chair early, or take the Bartlett approach.  (He can lose just as much at 1am as he can at 10pm)

6)  If you're looking around the table and asking yourself who the sucker is......it's you.

7)  Ties lose in pass the trash.