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No Reports of Bad Sex

October 1, 2004

OIL CITY, PA — With 26 days left before the completion of the Red Zone Alert, there has been no reports of "bad" or "unprotected" sex in the field of players.

"I have heard nothing in regards to pregnancies this season," said Jay Dilks while catching breakfast at a local coffee shop in Oil City.  "Usually, we hear of the bad news in November, but I really have a good feeling about this year."

Last year, the group saw Shawn Long fall to the Red Zone, while the group gave praise to fellow member Rick Dosky for his commitment to the tournament.  Rick saw himself in the hospital for birth 30 days before the Open Championship.  He purchased and had delivered flowers to his wife each day during the tournament.

"These two months are very difficult to many players," says Dilks.  "I know many wives associated with the tour are about to see things go back to normal as we exit this critical time period."

The Red Zone Alert started on August 5, 2004 and runs through October 26, 2004.  Players are asked to obstain from possible pregnancy until Zone Clearance has been given.