January 21, 2003

PITTSBURGH, PA — The Spackler Business Office announced today that it has received a letter of intent from confident rookie Don Crile, as well as an out-and-out challenge to the rest of the talented Carl Spackler Open Championship field.

Crile, a 6-1, 215 lb. relatively unknown player from Marianna, PA who carries an impressive +10 handicap, claims in his letter of intent that he will pressure the field with his distance off the tee.  Crile, known to close friends as D.C., is quoted to say that ?I thoroughly scouted the field before deciding to enter this year?s tournament.  I know that I can out drive this guy called Slick by at least 30 yards, and he seems to be one of this tour?s consistently big hitters.  The biggest problem that I?ve seen, though, is that the guy just can?t putt.  I can?t wait to use my Bazooka (driver) to my advantage, and put some real pressure on these guys.?

Greg Long, a.k.a. Slick, and one of the original founding members of the Captain?s Club, simply chuckled and just shook his head upon hearing Crile?s quote.  ?Rookies.  They all talk smack until they realize just how big this tournament really is.  We?ll see what happens off the tee when he sees those narrow fairways.?

Whispers around the tour, however, imply Crile has the game to back up his bold statements.  ?Yeah, I?ve heard of him.? says Matt Davis, a.k.a. Pokey and P.W.R.P founder.  ?Marianna?s a little bit of a distance south of Pittsburgh, but I?ve actually played in a tournament against him.  He sometimes has trouble 125 yards and in, but who wouldn?t with an explosive swing like his?  I?ll be curious to see if his mechanics hold up in a tourney like this, though.?

The biggest topic on everyone?s mind is Crile?s picture on the CSOC website.  Hevy Joesph commented, ?You?d think that somebody would?ve talked to him about his hairstyle by now.  It?s awful.  I mean, back in the ?80s, it was all the rage, you know?  But in the year 2003, a hairstyle that says ?business in the front and party in the back? just doesn?t work anymore.?  Thanks for the comment, and the spit bath, Hevy.

So does he have game or not?  Be sure to tune in to SNN to find out, and make sure to catch all of our coverage of the 2003 CSOC.