News Release
Loozers Lose
Don’t Step on my Blue Suede Size-Ten-Shoes(skis)
Where Have You Gone, Joe DiMaggio? (Part 3 of 3)
Hole 6: Pray
Hole 5: Small Pond
Dieterle Can't Decide
FORE-PEAT
Pledging No Profanity
Dieterle signs for GVII
Dieterle Back In Action
Dieterle signs for GVII

July 15, 2003

POWELL, OH — Max Dieterle confirmed today that he will be attending GVII. At a press conference to announce his commitment, he took a few minutes to expand on his views of GVII. "We just didn't burn enough stuff last year. I admit I was caught a little off guard when my Assistant Fire Marshal Joe "Webby" Hensley was a last minute no show. I was really counting on him to carry the main load of fire duty. It looks like I'll have to groom a new Assistant Fire Marshal this year; I don't think Joe will be back with that whole pharmacy school thing or whatever he's doing. Hopefully some member of this year's rookie crop will be up to assuming this key role of Golfapalooza."

GStan was thrilled to hear that Max would return. "Max has been at Golfapalooza ever since we've been having it at Alpine Lake and has contributed to its success every year. You can always count on him for anything, whether it's running to the kitchen to get jelly for the entertainment or accompanying sick Loozers to the hospital while giving outstanding directions."

It's right around 70 days until GVII. Start cleaning those clubs and gassing up your leaf blowers to bring with you.