August 18, 2003

WATERLOO, IL — "Patrick "Hurricane" Boland has officially signed for Golfapalooza VII", announced Founding Father and Sponsor Brent Kaniecki.  The announcement came at a press conference for the 4th Annual Tim Olwig Memorial Tournament.  "I was reluctant to make such an official proclamation until I received word from Golfapalooza headquarters that Pat's check actually cleared the bank.  The Hurricane's presence at GVII is greatly anticipated.  Founding Father GStan noted, "Anyone with that much prowess for gambling is a quality asset to the weekend."  Pat has other thoughts occupying his mind during the next 36 days, however.  "Low total" is all he said.  Based on his stellar performance off the tee and around the greens, Pat will be giving both Quackenbush and Slick a run for the title.  In response to Pat's signing, fellow Member Spanky is budgeting an extra $250 for gambling.

In related news, Olwig Scramble Partner & Founding Father Brent has spent multiple lessons with a local Waterloo pro and has been studying the mechanics of a golf swing in detail.  "Apparently, you are not supposed to jump out your shoes while swinging the club", Brent stated.