April 25, 2011
Ingo
VIRGINIA BEACH, VA — Chris Inghram, a Virginian, has signed a national letter-of-intent to play golf at the 2011 Carl Spackler Open, Mike Trojanowski of the Captains Club announced today. The rookie will join the rookie class of 24.
"My nickname is Ingo, but my friends in Mexico call me Gringo," says Inghram. "Fernando Martinez can obviously call me Gringo. I have even been toying around with Bert after my idol Bert Reynolds."
Trojanowski and the Captains Club have concerns about another hillbilly disguising himself as a Virginian. "Scott Miller tells me he is from the west part of Virginia. Like Parkersburg, WV," said Troj. "His parents are probably toothless and siblings."
Ingo has been heavily recruited for years, but experiences the same problem as several other attendees. A son or daughter with a early June birthday.
"The kitchen pass has been punched," says Ingo. "The wife is on board for at least this year. Remarkably... I did not even lose something else in the process."
Gringo is a high school extra-point kicker that uses the foot wedge when frustrated. "A talented foot comes in handy," says Gringo. "Nickles tells me it is against the rules of golf so I do not use when people are watching."
Chris has a very volitile handicap that surges upward with the driver. "The scores are determined before he leaves the house," says Kevin Long, Jr. "It all depends if he wants to exert some energy or leave the driver in the garage. He sure is a powerful player, but with no control."
Ingo is expected to receive 1 point for triple-bogey, 2 points for double-bogey, 3 points for bogey, and 5 points for par.
The 2011 Carl Spackler Open will be held at Mountain Valley Golf Course. There are 93 to 96 golfers expected for the 11th annual birthday party. Inghram's first appearance is expected to be made Thursday afternoon at the clubhouse bar.