News Release
Dilks Wins Tournament
Celebration of Golf
Tournament Underway
Practice Rounds Underway
Championship Preview
Up the Gut: Key to Jacket
6,450
Thursday's PM Practice Round
Thursday's AM Practice Round
Wednesday Night
Handicap Algorithm Modified
This is it!
The Quest for Gold
Whalen Set for 1st Major
The Red-Headed Slut: Part 3
The Red-Headed Slut: Part 2
The Red-Headed Slut: Part 1
Cole Boosts Outlook
Half-Dog Half-Human
Player Meeting Adjusted
Handicap Algorithm Modified

May 31, 2011

BARNESVILLE, PA — While the Captains Club finalizes preparation for its 11th Major Championship, a group of similar questions regarding tournament handicapping came to the business office over the past weeks resulting in an impromptu news conference to clear things up. Greg Long (i.e. Slick), Chairman of the Club, led the conference.

"Good Afternoon. My secretary put 7 post-it notes on my desk regarding handicapping questions," Long said. "I would like to clear things up."

Long continued, "Our 11th Major Championship will be scored just like the 1st back in 2001. We will be using points and each golfer will have their own set of points. The goal is to statistically distribute points to all golfers so they can shoot at least 60 points per round. I am extremely confident that is happening. The Point Leaderboards look very similar to the USGA Leaderboards online."

Bobby Owens asked, "I noticed a bump in my handicap last week. Can you elaborate?"

Long replied, "Yes. We make changes to the algorithm every couple of years as we analyze the trends and develop new ways to better the system.

We reduced golfer scoring volatility in 2009. People that do not golf regularly or rarely often have extreme scoring volatility. They can add 20 percent more strokes by wearing a different colored shirt. They can also drop 20 percent of their handicap by wearing their golf cap backwards. There are plenty of guys who arrive to the golf course with no idea whether they will shoot 100 or 120.

The Poststats.com Point base line target is 60 points. Golfers will receive a bump of 1 point for each 4 rounds of golf played each year."

"Owens replies, "Wow. I must have played 40 rounds in the past year. Do I get an extra 10 points per round?"

Slick replied, "No. The maximum is 5 points. It includes golf events like the Carl Spackler Open, however the 2010 Carl Spackler Open was 15 months ago and is not counted in the 2011 under scorecard posting frequency."

Owens replied, "My point target is not 65 points. Why?"

"You are one of the best amateur golfers to play in a major," replied Long. "The better the golfer... the more points. Add 4 points to your target because of your very low stroke handicap.

The first bump starts with golfers with a +14 or better stroke handicap.

I can guarantee 1 of the 24 unskilled golfers headed to Mountain Valley will drop 12 percent or more of their strokes during the 54-hole tournament. I cannot tell you who specifically will do it, but one of them will do it. It is statistically going to happen. With that said, it is impossible for you [Bobby Owens] to drop your average stroke total from 74 to 64 strokes. You require the bump in target to level the playing field.

Are there any additional questions?"

Jay Glover asked, "There are 5 or 6 sets of points that will give me my points target under my point analysis page on the website. Can I pick?" Slick replied, "Nope. The computer distributes using the priority number in the left column. I do not control the distribution."

Lacey Underall stepped in the room. Can my buddy Jason Ridgeway seriously win this tournament with 2 point for par and 8 points for birdie?" Slick replied, "Lacey. You are looking really good today. I really like your blouse."

[Pause]

"Back to your question... Yes... Jason Ridgeway. If Jason shoots his worst 3 rounds of the year like he did in 2005, he will not place well. He might be dressed in an outfit. That goes for Zabonik too. I was quite disappointed with both of them in Pottsville back in 2005.

Jason Ridgeway is no slouch. He has finished in the Top 8 in at least half of his tournaments. I think that speaks for itself. Next question.

Bill Dubois asked, "Do you have any other target elevations built in?" Long replied, "One. The more you play the same course, the more points you are given to level the playing field. If you play the same course 85% of the time, you will need more points to compete as you will struggle off your home course.

I will take one more question."

Lee Spruill asked, "Mountain Valley can be brutal. Do you have a favorite?" Slick replied, "To the best of my knowledge, we have never had a drunk champion or a sober person wearing the Carl Spackler Outfit except Jay Glover. That slice was amazing.

Mark Wray and Chris Hays have folded like lawn chairs year after year after year. Glenn Hoffert told me last June at Mountain Valley, 'I cannot be successful on these grounds'. I think there are a lot of guys who will be saying the same thing on Thursday night.

I think the contenders will have their game faces on during the practice round. I have my suspicions of a few possible losers when I see golfers who appear to be ready for a lap dance instead of a war. I would guess 60 guys can put together one great round, however do not have a swing that will not hold up through 54 holes. Another 50 will not be sober enough during all 3 rounds. Eliminate another 75 guys based on the mental requirements. That leaves 5 or 6 guys with a real chance.

The golf course is very tight in places. I believe Mountain Valley sets up for the guy who can hit the ball up the gut consistently."

The 2011 Carl Spackler Open will be held at Mountain Valley Golf Course in Barnesville, PA. The event expects 95 golfers for the 54-hole golf tournament.